President's Column - Summer 2023

eaar TBT Family,

As Independence Day approaches, I would like to share my background. I was born in Santiago, Chile. My father had the opportunity to go to New York City to train in Kidney Transplantation. The plan was to spend three years in the United States, then go back home. While we were in New York, there was a military coup in Chile and Augusto Pinochet took control as a violent dictator. He ruled from 1973 to 1990. Even though my grandparents missed us very much, they warned us not to come back. It is with this backdrop that I truly love this country and appreciate the freedoms that many take for granted. On July 4th, we will celebrate the birth of a nation built on the principles of freedom, equality, and justice for all. We know that our country is not perfect, and we still have work to do, but this is our inspiration, this is our goal.

For us, as Jews, Independence Day, and our commitment to freedom, resonates deeply. Rabbi Sharon Brous said, “The idea that it’s possible to move from slavery to freedom and from darkness to light and from despair to hope – that is the greatest Jewish story ever told.”

Independence Day should be a reminder that we must continue to uphold our democracy. As Jews we understand the importance of supporting our religious and cultural differences while also embracing our society’s diversity.

I am proud to say that TBT is doing that. We have a strong relationship with our interfaith community. We continue to sponsor Afghan refugee families. Our Kulanu group is leading us in fighting hate and antisemitism. We are supporting Madison PrideFest and literally raising the roof for people in poverty. We are proud of our big tent, and we acknowledge that the diversity in our synagogue makes us better. In this light, I will end with a quote from Nelson Mandela: “For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”

Shalom and Happy Independence Day,
Karen Goldberg

President's Column - June 2023

Hello Friends,

What a month it has been for Temple Beth Tikvah! What an honor it has been to be the president of TBT during these special Shehecheyanu moments.

Let’s start with our May 12th Shabbat service in our new sanctuary when we revealed the ark doors. We had set up for 100 people. Who could possibly have predicted that would not be enough? We scrambled to get more chairs and Gary Damiano rushed off to Stop and Shop to buy more food for the Oneg. As Taylor Swift says, “champagne problems.” The service filled me with memories that I will never forget. Seeing my son and so many of our incredible high school seniors honored in our new sanctuary brought tears to my eyes. Hearing Rabbi Offner on the bimah talking about the Interior Design Committee’s vision for the ark door three years ago filled me with gratitude. Having our Bat Mitzvah, Olivia Mervine-Schiff, help uncover our ark doors was beautiful, symbolic, and perfect. Then seeing those ark doors . . . the colors, the reflections, the Torah illuminated through the glass, the artistry . . . Shehecheyanu.

We had the opportunity to celebrate three B’nei Mitzvot in our new sanctuary this month. Mazel Tov to Simona Cottrill, Olivia Mervine-Schiff, and Joshua Glazer. Shehecheyanu.

We held our first annual meeting in our building in three years. We started that sacred meeting with a prayer, together singing Shehecheyanu.

We honored our Religious School teachers and had a special moment for Judy Pozzi who is retiring after 18 years of service at our Religious School. We are so grateful. Shehecheyanu.

Confirmation Shabbat celebrating our amazing teens. Shehecheyanu.

And finally, the greatest miracle of all . . . the birth of Rabbi Danny Moss and Rabbi Susan Landau Moss’s baby boy. On Friday July 28th, our congregation will have the opportunity to share in a blessing for our Rabbinic family. Shehecheyanu.

The literal translation of Shehecheyanu means “that we are alive.” As Jews we have a tradition of gratitude. We are thankful for all our blessings and that we are alive at this moment. As a community we have had a challenging three years. We had social isolation from COVID, we had clergy transitions, and we had what felt like a never-ending building renovation. I feel as if I am now at the top of the mountain seeing the holy land . . . and it is beautiful.

Praised are you G-d, ruler of the universe, for granting us life, for sustaining us, and for helping us to reach this day. Shehecheyanu.

Blessings,
Karen Goldberg

President's Column - May 2023

Hello Friends,

April 17 was Yom HaShoah, and I attended the beautiful service at our sister congregation in Chester. It started with a powerful presentation by Judith Altmann, a Holocaust survivor who was liberated by the allies from Auschwitz. She spoke about her early memories: her parents’ store being closed, not being allowed to attend school, her family’s move to the ghetto, the crowded train to the camps, being separated from her parents, standing on the line that was allowed to live, and watching her parents on the other line. . . She talked about the hunger, the smell, the death march, and the sickness. She finished by telling us that it was her responsibility as one of the survivors to continue to tell her story. It made me realize that soon there will no longer be firsthand witnesses to the Holocaust, and it will be up to us to continue to retell their stories. Not only must we never forget, we also cannot allow the rest of the world to forget.

This is my family’s story. All four of my grandparents were from Eastern Europe, and they were all Holocaust survivors. Many of you know that my mother lived in a displaced persons camp for five years, and she was one of the lucky ones. It is hard to even wrap my brain around 6 million Jews lost, among them 1.5 million children. European Jewry decimated. Jews scattering around the world. This painful history is part of the fabric of my Jewish soul.

My parents ended up in Chile. For a long time, I thought everyone in Chile was Jewish. My cousins went to Jewish schools, had Jewish friends, attended Jewish camps, and belonged to Jewish pool clubs. Their ingrained trauma bonded them together and reinforced the importance of being Jewish.

When Rabbi Moss asked us, “Why be Jewish?” my first response was this: it is a miracle that I am alive. Four of my grandparents had to beat the odds for me to be here today. My grandparents survived as proud and strong Jews. How could I walk away from that legacy?

Although this is true, on further reflection, I believe there must more to “why Jewish” then just a response to evil. Even as antisemitism is on the rise, and we are banding together, I prefer to choose Judaism out of joy and respect. So, to further answer Rabbi Moss’s question, “Why be Jewish?” I say -

I choose Judaism because I love our values, I love our music, I love our focus on learning, I love our community, I love our traditions, I love our spirituality, I love our prayers, I love our priority on family, and I love Israel.

My grandparents were deeply traumatized by the Holocaust, and they rarely spoke about their experiences. The one message that I do remember from my grandmother Anna was that all those Jewish lives were not lost in vain, because after the Holocaust we were given the land of Israel. My grandparents were all fervent Zionists, and they passed along that love to my parents and to me. Israel is a complicated place, and it is problematic in many ways, but I can’t help but to love Israel deeply.

The service last night ended with the Hatikvah. I too will end this column with those powerful words.

So long as within the inmost heart a Jewish spirit sings, so long as the eye looks eastward, gazing toward Zion, our hope is not lost. The hope of two thousand years: to be a free people in our land, the land of Zion and Jerusalem.

Blessings,
Karen Goldberg

President's Column- March 2023

Dear Friends,

I recently had a conversation with a friend that reminded me how differently people think. This woman was feeling very dissatisfied with work and was under a lot of stress trying to decide if she should quit. She had gone to her son’s sporting event and while waiting for the game to end had spoken about this to another parent. The next day that parent showed up at her house with a dinner she had made for my friend “since she was going through a hard time.” What a nice thing to do, right?

Well, my friend was livid and embarrassed, and this act of kindness sent her into a spiral. She felt pathetic, pitied, and as she said, "felt like punching this woman in the face.” Luckily, she did not act on this impulse. This story reminds me that what I need and appreciate is not necessarily what others need and appreciate. 

I bring this up because Temple Beth Tikvah is embarking on a new initiative, called Chesed - the Hebrew word for kindness or love between people. During the first year of the pandemic Rabbi Offner reached out to congregants asking for “helping hands.” There was an outpouring of support to help people with groceries, meals, camaraderie, etc. 

I believe you shouldn’t need a pandemic for our congregation to spread kindness and love. Amy Lee and Leslie Hyman are leading the efforts - one we hope will become a foundational value of TBT. We had our initial meeting with 10 members and have come up with a first step. You all will receive a survey to inform our group about our community’s most important needs. Some ideas we have brainstormed are providing meals when a family member is sick or has passed away, driving people who need a ride, providing companionship to people who may need a friend, babysitting for overworked parents that need a break, and on and on. Those were OUR thoughts but more importantly we want to know YOURS. We will also be asking if you are willing to join our efforts. 

We are going to need more people to help us with this project. My concern, however, is not a lack of people wanting to help but people feeling shy or embarrassed to ask for assistance. Therefore, I remind you that it is a mitzvah to do acts of loving kindness, but I believe that it is even more of a MITZVAH to receive assistance when needed. It makes you vulnerable, but it is just this genuine vulnerability that opens us to true connections with our TBT family. Learning to receive is a gift to ourselves but also a gift to the giver. There is no greater feeling for me than that sense that I have made someone else’s day easier and brighter. Therefore, it is a win/win situation. 

So please, fill out the questionnaire when you receive it and if you feel inspired to participate feel free to email Amy Lee amyjolee22@gmail.com or Leslie Hyman lch711@aol.com.

May we all be givers and receivers and may Chesed always be the culture of Temple Beth Tikvah.

Blessings,
Karen Goldberg

President's Column - February 2023

Dear Friends,

In my column last month, I spoke about the strength of TBT coming from our members and their dedication to our community.  That was on clear display this weekend.  For those of you who missed it, the TBT Kulanu group hosted a community discussion about antisemitism.  We had tables and chairs set up for 120 people. 

The night before the event when I spoke to Harry Schanzer (my Dad and chair of the Kulanu Working Group), he admitted that he was worried “about the numbers.”  I asked, “too many or too few?”  He said, “too few.”  WRONG answer!!! 

We had more than 300 people from the Shoreline show up to learn how to combat antisemitism.  It was truly emotional and uplifting to see so many congregants, neighbors, friends, teens, politicians, clergy, educators, and allies come together against hate.  It made me proud to be Jewish, proud to be a member of Temple Beth Tikvah, and proud to live on the CT shoreline. 

After listening to Stacy Sobel, CT ADL Director, discuss what the ADL is doing to fight hate, two TBT congregants spoke of their own experiences with antisemitism.  Thank you to Maya Daniels, our courageous middle schooler, and the eloquent  Susan Ottenheimer, daughter of founding members of TBT.  We then broke into groups of ten to talk about our own experiences with hate or antisemitism.  In just my small group I heard about a landlord saying, “don’t go to that pool, that’s where the Jews go.”  Someone else told the story of leaving her job after her manager told her to “not market to the Jews” and the lawsuit that followed.  A third member talked about his struggle when he found out someone he does business with is a Holocaust denier. 

These were powerful stories that made me think about how I would respond in these situations and how I would want my children to react.  If we truly believe NEVER AGAIN, we must act. 

Step one is realizing that there is no place for hate and there is no such thing as a “microaggression.”  A racist joke is not funny, a Jewish slur is not “just a saying,” a homophobic comment is never OK, and speaking up is our duty. 

Kulanu means all of us. And it will take all of us to continue the mission to confront and fight antisemitism in our world.  This forum was only the first that our team is planning.  We look forward to many more.  I would like to thank the Kulanu task force - Harry Schanzer, Rabbi Moss, Kim Romine, Rosemary Baggish, Nancy Fliss, Irma Grebel, Louis King, and Andrea SanMarco – for their initiative, hours of planning, dedication, and leadership.

Karen Goldberg

President's Column - January 2023

Hello Friends,

I don’t need to tell any of you that TBT has gone through A LOT of change over the last few years. Allow me to list some of them: we had the COVID disruption, a building renovation, a new rabbi, a new cantorial soloist/educator, and a new preschool director, and now we are searching for a replacement for Bonnie, our administrative assistant. Any one of these events would have been enough to devastate a synagogue; however, I will argue that Temple Beth Tikvah is thriving.

Nationwide, many synagogues are shrinking after the pandemic, yet our membership has been stable. Our preschool is full and has a waiting list. Religious school children are busy learning and are making friends. Our SALTY teens are engaged and filled with RUACH, going to BBYO events locally and nationally. The men’s group gets together to cook, discuss important issues, gathering for spiritual events with the rabbi, and build our Sukkah. Kol Ami women are hiking, participating in ceremonies, tasting wine, watching movies, and celebrating the new moon. The new Kulanu steering committee is organizing events to combat antisemitism with more and more volunteers that want to help. Torah Study is well attended and filled with good natured opinionated people. Shabbat services are now back in our building, and it is inspiring to see so many people joining together in prayer and song in our downstairs space. Finally. I am proud to say that we have now raised more than 7 million dollars in our capital campaign, and we are not done yet. . .

So why is Temple Beth Tikvah flourishing during all these challenges? I have often considered this lying awake at 2 AM worrying about the next crisis. . . and this is what I have come up with. TBT is thriving because of YOU, because of US. We are not about a fancy building, or even about our amazing clergy, staff, or teachers. TBT is about a group of 300 families that love our community and are willing to donate time and money to make sure that our community continues to grow and thrive, not only for ourselves but for our children and our children’s children, L’dor v’dor. As the Talmud says, “As my parents planted for me before I was born, so do I plant for those who will come after me.” We are literally and figuratively planting for our children.

As both a parent and a pediatrician, my goal is to help raise resilient children who can respond to change and hardship. As the temple president, I am relieved to know that our synagogue community has done just that. Temple Beth Tikvah is resilient, flexible, and strong. Thank you for making it so.

Karen Goldberg
President

President's Column - December 2022

Hello Friends,

I am currently writing this piece from an Orlando hotel room. I am attending my first in-person medical conference in over three years. What a gift it is to be able to escape the clinical craziness of flu, RSV, croup and Covid and to be able to spend five calm days just learning. I would like to share some of my new-found medical knowledge with you.

The title of one of my lectures today was "Non-Pharmacological Interventions for Mental Health Conditions". The lecturer listed seven healthy habits that are not only protective against mental illness but can also help to treat people already suffering from anxiety and depression. These include getting enough sleep, exercising, developing and maintaining friendships, good nutrition, practicing mindfulness and relaxation, spending time in green spaces, and decreasing time on screens (especially social media).

I thought about this list and how it pertains to my life habits. How do you measure up? Don’t worry, I have good news for you. Temple Beth Tikvah is here to help. Do you not get enough sleep, and are you unable to relax? Try out Jewish Mindfulness and Meditations sessions on Saturday mornings. Do you not spend enough time outside exercising? Join the Kol Ami hikers on the trails every weekend. Want to make new friends or to strengthen old friendships? Come to our Men’s Group, join the Book Club, try our Torah Study. Want some nutrition? Come to the Temple during Sunday school and eat and schmooze with other parents, stay for an oneg, or join us after Friday night services for one of our new Shabbat dinners at local restaurants.

And speaking of Shabbat, try to turn off your phone, distance yourself from social media, and experience the joy of singing and praying together. During these stressful times, TBT is just what the doctor ordered. And I won’t even charge you a copay.

Hope to see you soon,
Karen Goldberg

President's Column - Fall 2022

Dear Friends,

A few months ago, I wrote my first president’s column. I told the story of meeting with Rabbi Alpert when I was feeling uninvolved in Judaism, unconnected with TBT and just exhausted. spoke about how he inspired me to do one small thing regularly to get the “spark” of Judaism back in my life. After Rabbi Offner read my piece, she asked me if she could send it to Rabbi Alpert. I agreed, a little embarrassed that I had not thought of tracking him down myself. This was his response. “I am leaving for Israel tomorrow and I don’t think I will need an airplane to fly there.”

 Not only did I make his day brighter, but whenever I think of that response, it fills me with happiness and makes me smile. Gratitude is a two-way street. It makes the giver and the beneficiary feel better. In fact, there are studies that show that keeping a gratitude journal daily is as effective a treatment as antidepressant medication. So, with these days of reflection upon us, let us think about what we are grateful for and whom we are grateful for. Let’s not forget to let those people know.

I will go first. . . I would like to thank all the great Rabbis who have helped shape my life. Being

president has taught me one thing for sure: being a Rabbi is a 24 hours / 7 day a week job and it is hard. I would like to thank Rabbi Moss for his unending work and dedication to our synagogue. Starting his career as a senior Rabbi during a pandemic, during a renovation project, and a Cantor search has been a huge challenge. Just one of these things (dayenu) would have been enough. His persistence and love for TBT is clear. I am honored to partner with him.

L'Shana Tova,
Karen Goldberg

President's Column - Summer 2022

Hello TBT,

Approximately 11 years ago I was sitting through a high holy day service. Rabbi Tom Alpert, TBT’s interim Rabbi, was leading us in prayer. At that time, I had a demanding job and a 10-, 8-, and 6-year-old. I felt like I was barely treading water.

I was listening to the sermon which must have meant that the kids were downstairs with the SALTY teens. Some of you may remember the sermon, it was about feeling inspired by Judaism. He used the words, “feeling the spark.” I remember this clearly because it made me feel sad. As a child and teen, I had felt that spark. I loved being in youth group and loved my Jewish summer camp. Rowdy song sessions, outside Shabbat services, Israeli dancing, meaningful discussions, rallying for Soviet Jews, going on a NIFTY trip to Israel, etc. . . . made me feel great about being Jewish. However, at this time in my life, sending my kids to Hebrew school and going to a few services a year felt like I was just checking off an obligatory box.

I made an appointment to talk to Rabbi Alpert. I told him about my feelings and how his sermon had resonated with me. I explained that I wanted to be more involved but felt drained and didn’t have the time. We had a long discussion and I remember him telling me that it was ok. This may not be the time in my life when I can dedicate a lot of time to the synagogue. He did however advise me to find one small thing I can do regularly to rekindle that spark. I started picking up Challah on my way home from work on Friday evenings. That was it, that was what I could manage.

Now here I am 11 years later writing my first column as your temple president. I now feel very satisfied with my Jewish immersion. I have found community at TBT. I am so grateful to feel that inspiration while praying on Friday nights, while hiking in the woods and even while participating in temple board meetings. It all feels holy and I am all in.

! I share this story because I know many of you may feel the same way I did 11 years ago. I am here to say, that is OK. It may not be your time. . . or it may be the perfect time. Find one small activity: maybe social justice, maybe a service, maybe a hike, maybe torah study, or maybe just pick up a Challah. You never know where that one thing will lead.

Blessings,
Karen Goldberg

President's Column - June 2022

Dear Friends,

This will mark my last article as President of TBT. On July 1, Karen Goldberg will step up and become the president, along with an amazing Board of Directors. That Board consists of many brand new Board members alongside some who have served TBT well over the years. We are lucky to have all of these leaders willing and ready to help TBT and I am grateful to each and every one of them for signing up for next year.

While it has been an extraordinary two years, I feel happy to say to all of you that TBT has such a bright future ahead. And not just in the distant future! We will soon have our own newly renovated building and we will gather there once again like we used to before the world turned upside down. And even before it is fully done we will continue to meet and be together and look for opportunities to see each other all summer. One such opportunity is just around the corner – the scholar in residence. Maybe we will see each other there,

One thing I can say for sure after these two years is how many wonderful and energetic people – clergy, staff, and countless volunteers -- it takes to make a temple run! And we are lucky to have so many of those people! These people do their part with willing hearts and open hands and do not ask for anything in return, except that the temple community continue to thrive. They are the backbone that hold us all up and we are so fortunate that our backbone is strong. At the same time, we are fortunate to have all of our members, who make up the heart and soul of the place.

As I have said before, even when you aren’t at TBT, you are part of the reason that it is doing so well. Because of you, we had countless B’Nai Mitzvah over the last two years, we helped people mourn, we helped people celebrate, we studied, we sang, we taught our big kids and our little kids, we prayed, we supported refugees and other people in need, and we have helped one another in countless ways.

For me and for my family, I thank you for being part of TBT every day and for helping to make it the inclusive and welcoming place it has always been. I am excited to sit back on the sidelines and watch all of the ways it will continue to grow and thrive into the future.

B’Shalom,
Sarah