We are in the middle of Bar Mitzvah season here at TBT. Thank God, we are blessed with packs of families with 13 year olds. Last week, this week, next week – in fact, we have a Bar or Bat Mitzvah to celebrate every single Shabbat from now right through June.
They are always exhilarating. One of the things I love about them is that you get to see yourself through the eyes of others – family and friends, Jews and non-Jewish people too, who are visiting TBT for the first time. One of the nicest compliments that I receive after the service often goes like this: “Oh Rabbi, your synagogue is amazing. It is so warm and loving and intimate and accessible. If I lived here, I would join here. It is so warm, open, intimate and accessible.” That is why we are here today. We are here to celebrate that we are warm and open and intimate and accessible. And we are here because it is time to make sure that our building and our property and our bricks and mortar all reflect just those Jewish values that we so passionately embrace as a community.
It is time to make our building warmer, more open, more intimate and more accessible. We’ve earned that. We deserve that. And it is our responsibility to ensure that for the generations that come after us. Forty years is a long time. Our building is aging. It has cracks, some literal and some figurative. It is not easy to find from the road. It is not easy to drive up into the parking lot. It is not easy to walk from the parking lot to the building. It is not easy to open the front door. It is not easy to find your way, once inside, to the sanctuary, to the rabbi’s study, to the youth lounge.
Accessibility is a Jewish value. A Jewish imperative. We say: “Hamitzvah hazot lo ba’shamayim hi; hi karov aleycha me’od.” (Deut 30:12-14) “The mitzvah of Jewish practice is not up in the Heavens, we don’t make it hard, we place it close to you.” It is time to make coming to the synagogue easy. Picture an easy entrance right off the road. An easy drive into the parking lot. An Open Door and a Welcoming Entrance.
Hidur Mitzvah is also a Mitzvah. It is a Jewish value to beautify what we treasure. There are so many ways that we can beautify our synagogue. With art. With color. With height. With light. With windows.
The most exquisite piece of this synagogue building is what sits outside of its walls. The exquisite piece of nature that God created. The trees and the leaves and the sky and the sunshine. Let us take advantage of that! It is a requirement that a sanctuary have windows. (Mishnah Berurah) We can have windows that are big and wide and open to the world around us.
Our synagogue should be accessible. Not because the government requires accessibility, but because we are Jews and our tradition demands it. The Book of Psalms says of the aged: “Don’t cast me off as I age.” We are all aging, and without insulting our founders I can tell you for a fact that each and every one of them is precisely 40 years older than they were 40 years ago. Our bathrooms are not handicap accessible. It is a ‘bousha,’ (that’s Hebrew for ‘shonda’). But it need not be that way any longer. We can make our bathrooms handicap accessible. We can make our bima handicap accessible. We can make every square inch of our building easier to navigate and more spiritually uplifting to experience.
Our building is beautiful. Our founders created a space that has served us amazingly well for 40 years. It is time to re-envision. It is time to dream. It is time to build, to build upon that which has already been built, to build upon the shoulders of those who came before us, to build a synagogue that says “HERE WE ARE.” To build a synagogue that says “COME AND JOIN US.” To build a synagogue that is as warm and welcoming and traditional and contemporary and bold and conservative and beautiful and accessible as we are.
Rabbi Abraham Kook, the first rabbi of Palestine, as he contemplated the enterprise of building a state of Israel, famously said: HaYashen Tichadesh v’Ha Chadash Tikadesh. The old shall be renewed, and the new shall be made holy.
The time is now, for building and rebuilding together.
L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner
(This column was excerpted from Rabbi Offner’s remarks at the Congregational Meeting on March 11, 2018)
Rabbi's Column - March 2018
From the Maxwell House Haggadah to the “10-Minute Seder,” there are more editions and publications of haggadot for Passover than there are prayerbooks for any other Jewish holiday…by far.
Why are there so many types and varieties of Haggadot? Which haggadah will you be using around your seder table? Will you buy a haggadah, find one on the internet, create your own – even use a PowerPoint haggadah instead of a hard copy?
There are literally thousands of Haggadot to choose from because Passover is a holiday that speaks to the quintessential creation story of our people. It is the story of a journey – from slavery to freedom, from degradation to respect, from despair to exhilaration, from darkness to light.
This theme which is at the center of Jewish life speaks to all human beings who yearn to be free. That is why Passover has been the holiday that has generated a Freedom Seder, a Civil Rights Seder, a Women’s Seder and an Immigration Seder. On Passover we sit around our seder tables and take the journey ourselves, recalling our enslavements and tasting of a world where all humanity are free.
Interestingly enough, the Maxwell House Haggadah reveals a classic American story. It was first printed in 1931 when Jewish immigrants to the United States were yearning for recognition and affirmation of their American standing. That Maxwell House wanted to market to the Jewish community was a sign of having ‘made it’ in America. As a part of an ad campaign for their coffee, Maxwell House offered their Haggadah free with the purchase of coffee. The campaign also helped dissuade some in the Jewish community of the mistaken understanding that coffee (because it is a ‘bean’), is not kosher for Passover. The coffee bean is a berry; not a legume. Talk about success stories – there are now over 50 million copies of the Maxwell House Haggadah in print!
There are many other free Haggadot worthy of exploration. Just go to www.haggadot.com to make your own step-by-step Haggadah. There are also some beautiful haggadot for purchase. “A Passover Haggadah,” with illustrations by Leonard Baskin, is a personal favorite. So too the “Gates of Freedom” Haggadah, edited by Rabbi Chaim Stern.
You can find a Haggadah for scholars and one for kids and another for seekers. The most important point is that there is a Haggadah for you. As Passover approaches, exploring the many possibilities for how to tell the story is as important as the telling of the story. Let all who are hungry come and eat. Let all who are hungry for the telling and the retelling of our sacred story, reflect upon the many choices of Haggadot that are before us. May we choose wisely as we prepare for the sacred task of reliving our people’s journey from slavery to freedom.
L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner
Rabbi's Column - February 2018
As you read these words, I will be back from my January sabbatical. As I write them, I am with you from afar, wanting to share my gratitude for this precious time and wanting to let you know a bit about how I have spent my time. It is a privilege to be able to have shifted my focus from the daily tasks of work and life in order to live fully in a different kind of present, where clutter is cleared from the landscape and perspective is sharpened.
During my month away, I discovered that it isn’t so easy to let go and allow the present moment to envelop in such a fashion that tasks recede and living expands. How do we fill our lives? How do we shape each day? Too often, we allow the day to shape us. Tasks that have to get done take precedence. Events that happen to us consume our time before we get to decide how we would choose to use our time.
I have chosen to spend much of my time studying the texts of Jewish Mysticism. I look forward to sharing what I have learned with you as I am developing a 4-week Lunch & Learn on Jewish Mysticism. Do mark your calendars now for the 4 Wednesdays in April at noon for our class. The challenge of making life meaningful has been with us forever. In our age we have unique challenges – like those that technology has created for us – but there have always been distractions in life and there have always been efforts to clear those distractions so we can create lives of meaning. Jewish Mysticism is based on the belief that we humans can attain a consciousness that leads us to experience awe and wonder at any moment. It is the simplest of opportunities because it is right before us all the time, but it is the hardest of endeavors because we humans are so easily distracted. The Jewish mystics dedicated their lives, their study, their every-day routines, to achieve a level of consciousness that they described as an experience of the Divine. I have been spending much of my time reading the texts of Jewish mysticism and discovering just how hard and challenging but also how compelling the language of mysticism is.
Consider this. We are all familiar with the 121st psalm. We often recite this psalm at times of tragedy or loss. We say: “I lift my eyes to the heavens, from where (m’ayin in the Hebrew) will my help come? The mystics say no. We’ve got it wrong. Look again. The word ‘m’ayin,’ which we think so obviously means ‘from where?’ could also be pronounced ‘m’ayn’ which translates as ‘from Nothing.’ It is not a question at all; it is an answer. Where does our help come from? From Nothing. Our help comes from Nothing. What the mystics are suggesting is that ‘Nothingness’ is at the center – not in a nihilistic way, but to remind us that no thing is crucial, rather it is being itself that is crucial.
I have been personally focused on the challenge of being more and doing less. It is easier to do while away. Even then, it is not so easy for distractions rise like the mist on the waters. You sometimes don’t even notice that they are distractions, but they are always there.
This has been a precious time for me. I have had time for learning and time for rest and time for fun. Being full-time with Nancy has been the best of blessings. It has been a privilege to be away from the constant demands of the rabbinate, but it is also from afar that it becomes so clear how precious our TBT community is.
I return to you invigorated and excited about all of our upcoming adventures at hand: our congregational trip to Israel, our re-imagining of our building and strengthening and beautifying it for the future, our marking together of Jewish time and celebrating Shabbat together each week, and being with you to celebrate your lives, the peaks and the valleys, to celebrate the awe and wonder of life together.
L'Shalom -
Rabbi Offner
Rabbi's Column - January 2018
It is hard to believe that I am already in my 6th year at TBT. In anticipation of soon being in my 7th year, the Board of Directors and I have been in discussion about possible Sabbatical time. Given the very full schedule of events, it seemed best to break up any sabbatical time into smaller parts - hence, we have agreed upon a first step of one month of sabbatical time to be taken January 1-31, 2018.
My first priority is to assure coverage for the congregation during the time that I will be away. Cantor Margolius will be in charge of all clergy needs. Cantor Margolius has already demonstrated his strong skills and the congregation will be in very good hands. Leading our congregation is a team effort and so I also want to thank our Administrator, Kim Romine and Administrative Assistant, Bonnie Mahon for stepping up and making sure everything is seamless, as always.
The notion of a sabbatical comes directly from the Jewish value of ‘shavat vayinafash,’ to stop in order to replenish. I feel blessed to be the rabbi of TBT. It is a privilege to be present with so many times of great intimacy, joy and even sadness, in your lives. I love leading worship, teaching Torah, officiating at life cycle events, engaging with the greater Shoreline community, representing the Jewish community to interfaith endeavors, and providing pastoral care to our congregants. I take very seriously the import of my being available at times of need, not only on a full-time basis, but virtually on an all-the-time basis.
While I am energized by the demands of my work, I am also aware of the need to tend to my own professional and spiritual development. I realize that I am hungry for a period of time to replenish my spiritual reserves and better serve the congregation. The rabbis teach the concept: “livnot u’l’hi-banot,” that is, we can best help to build up others, when we build up ourselves.
What will I do? In some ways, my goal is to ‘do’ less and ‘be’ more. Nancy and I will be out-of-town, hoping to power off in order to recharge. I have a long list of reading material, which I am eager to shape into Adult Education courses upon my return.
I am very grateful to the Board of Directors for its support and blessing. I am grateful to you as well for your enthusiasm. The months go by quickly; I am sure that I will be back in what seems like a flash. At the same time, I hope something of this sabbatical will last forever.
L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner
Rabbi's Column - December 2017
I love Chanukah. I can’t wait for the holiday to begin. Why do I love it so much? Funny, but it’s for reasons you might not expect. First, I love Chanukah because it is such an easy holiday. In contrast to Rosh Hashanah or Pesach, there is very little planning that needs to go into Chanukah. What a gift. Just take out the menorah, light the candles, and...it’s Chanukah.
I also love Chanukah because of the requirement that the candles are not to be ‘used,’ but ‘enjoyed.’ What it means in practical terms is that for the 7 or 8 minutes it takes for the candles to burn down, we are required to STOP, to just sit and enjoy, to reflect in the reflection, and glow in the glow of the beautiful candles.
In some ways I wish it could happen every day of the year, but what makes Chanukah special is that 8 nights in a row the family gathers together and visits - no TV, no homework, no dinner. Just family, candles, and time. It’s not even a long time. But a ten-minute evening ritual can be a wonderful moment in time.
Oh, you say, but I forgot to mention the presents! Yes, let’s talk about presents for a moment. I am certainly not against presents. How wonderful that we take time to think of others and offer and receive gifts from them. But eight nights is a lot of nights. How might we approach this gift-giving holiday without being overwhelmed by consumerism? A couple of ideas. One, we might put a $5 limit on all gifts. That forces everyone to be clever in their approach to thinking about gifts. Or, how about a $1 limit on the first night, $2 on the second night, up to $8 on the eighth night?
Another possibility: different kinds of gifts for each of the nights. One night can be a gift you buy, one night can be a gift you write, one night can be a gift you bake, and so on. Need more ideas? How about a gift-of-self night (non-money items such as cleaning a room, or a no-fighting-with-siblings night); a tzedakah night (everyone finds some clothes or toys and wraps them as a gift to a social service agency), a book or poem night where everyone reads a favorite passage, or a gift-you-make night.
Here’s an idea for the third night: give yourself the gift of an adult Chanukah and come to the Latkes & Vodkas celebration sponsored by Federation at the Guilford Yacht Club.
And the fourth night gift: bring the whole family to our Chanukah Dinner, Latkes & Menorah-lighting here at the synagogue.
Chanukah is fun but its message is more important than ever. It is a message of spreading light in a time of darkness, celebrating religious freedom rather than religious coercion, and living with hope rather than fear.
L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner
Rabbi's Column - November 2017
The month of November has only one Jewish holiday in it: Thanksgiving. “Wait,” you say, “Thanksgiving? That’s not a Jewish holiday!” True, it is not technically a part of the Jewish calendar, but it is, though secular, one of the most Jewish of holidays. It is Jewish because it is based upon two of the most Jewish of values: THANKS and GIVING.
Judaism teaches that we are to give thanks every day. There is so much to give thanks for, even in times of trouble. Judaism also teaches that the act of giving - of ourselves, of our good fortune, of your monetary resources - is a spiritual discipline.
This particular Autumn has been about as gorgeous as Autumn gets here in New England. While we have been enjoying beautiful weather, we are keenly aware of other places and other people who have not been as fortunate as we have been.
At this season on Thanksgiving, I want to give you the opportunity to express thanks for our good fortune by giving to others who are in need. There is a long list. We continue to focus our concern upon those affected by hurricanes in Florida, Texas, and the Carribean, and those affected by the dreadful wildfires in California. Those disasters hit close to home when we learn of people we know or communities we connect with that are suffering.
Our Jewish community suffered a dreadful loss as the Reform Movement’s Camp Newman burned to the ground in Santa Rosa, California. I spent many years in leadership at URJ Camp Swig, which was the precursor to Camp Newman. Fortunately, no lives were lost at Camp Newman, but when I think of the summer spirit and all those facilities teeming with the joys of Jewish children, I shudder for their breathtaking loss. We can help rebuild our Reform Jewish Camp Newman by going to campnewman.org to lend our support.
We are also well connected to the synagogue in St. Thomas where my colleague, Michael Feshbach, serves as Rabbi. He writes:
“I am grateful that the damage to the synagogue itself was limited, although it was significant. We lost all our machzors, most of our haggadot, some our our siddurum, cabinets and other furniture in the museum, extensive damage in both of our historic cemeteries. We may have lost our keyboard and we have water pumps and perhaps a generator switch which needs to be replaced. We double-wrapped the scrolls during both storms (some of which were saved from the fire in our building in 1831!) but were taken by surprise by the Kol Nidrei night deluge. We found a damp ark and ruined white materials the morning of Yom Kippur. One scroll was slightly wet; we believe it is not permanently damaged. We have real damage and need support, but we know things could have been much worse. We must take care not to let there be too long-lasting damage to the spirit of the place. And we know we can come back better than we were.”
Those interested in helping can go to the Facebook page “The Hebrew Congregation of St. Thomas” or to their webpage at
www.synagogue.vi.
We are a small but mighty people. “Kol Yisrael Eruvin zeh b’zeh,” we are all connected to one another. At this season of Thanksgiving, we show our thanks by giving to those in need.
L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner
Rabbi's Column - October 2017
What in the world could the Holy One have been thinking to pack FOUR major holidays into one month! Nevertheless, we Jews have been indefatigable in celebrating just those holidays: Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, and Simchat Torah. As I write these words, we are still in anticipation of Rosh Hashanah. But by the time you read them, Yom Kippur will be over. The Book of Life will have been opened, our own lives reviewed, and the new chapters are just beginning.
That is where Sukkot and Simchat Torah come in. How wonderful to celebrate Sukkot, out on the TBT deck, in our wondrous Sukkah, set up by the Men’s Club and decorated by our Nursery
School & Religious School children. Sukkot reminds us of the beauty of nature and of its fragility. We are still post-hurricanes and continue to be awed if not overwhelmed by the ferocious power of wind and rain. (And no, it’s not too late to donate to the cause - my favorite one being NECHAMA, A Jewish Response to Disaster. You can give at nechama.fundraise.org).
Every year at Simchat Torah, the unfurling of the Torah scroll throughout the congregation is an awe-inspiring wonder to behold. We end the Torah and we begin again. Simchat Torah
marks the conclusion to our season of new beginnings. We celebrate a new year at Rosh Hashanah, a new opportunity at Yom Kippur, a new harvest at Sukkot, and a new cycle of Torah at Simchat Torah.
Endings and beginnings. The order of these words is significant because it is indeed a cycle that we are celebrating.
Moadim L’Simcha - May the holidays still ahead of us be filled
with joy.
Rabbi Offner
Rabbi's Column - September 2017
I am in my seat at the Metropolitan Opera House. The majestic crystal chandeliers start their rise into the sky. The spotlight reveals an elegantly attired conductor. The house falls silent, he lifts his baton, the orchestra begins. The music goes straight to my heart; I am enraptured by my favorite moment, the overture.
Selichot is the overture for our High Holidays. You don’t want to miss it. It is a truly breathtaking service. This year, with Mishkan HaLev, the new prayer book for Elul and Selichot, we can soar in spirit and reflection, in ways that are contemporary and traditionial.
The High Holiday season is somber and the work we do is heavy. How refreshing then to begin our overture with Mishkan HaLev, which works because it is rooted in joy and celebrates the opportunities the season offers us to change our lives. The name of the book itself - Mishkan HaLev - not only promises a connection to the other Mishkan prayers books in our lives, but also a focus on the heart - a joyful heart.
Yehuda Amichai’s beautiful poetry appears throughout the book, tying together both the ancient and the modern with timely, meaningful messages that are neither moralistic nor pedantic. One poem, “The Place Where We Are Right,” demonstrates this theme:
From the place where we are right
Flowers will never grow
In the spring.
The place where we are right
Is hard and trampled
Like a yard.
But doubts and loves
Dig up the world
Like a mole, a plow.
And a whisper will be heard in the place
Where the ruined
House once stood.
Mishkan HaLev helps open our hearts to the tasks at hand. I look forward to seeing you at Selichot Services on Saturday, September 16th at 7pm, when the new book will be in our hands as we open the gates of 5778.
L’Shanah Tovah Tikateivu,
Rabbi Stacy K. Offner
Rabbi's Column - Summer 2017
Dear Friends -
The months of July and August are upon us and we are going to take advantage of these summer days with some special opportunities here at TBT.
First, I want to thank everyone who responded to my query about 6pm summer services. I was astounded by the enthusiasm that was registered by so many of you. Here is a smattering of responses so you get a taste:
"I like the earlier time for senior citizens."
"We might actually make it there with the kids if it was earlier. We like the idea!"
"We would prefer a 6pm start time."
"Our family would like 6:00pm summer services."
"Sounds like a great idea to me."
"Sounds good to me!"
Nevertheless, I was sobered by the responses from those who prefer
the 7:15pm service: "We would be unable to come."
"I prefer the services at 7:15."
"I am on a late schedule, so 6:00 seems rather early to me."
So what should we do? If this were a strictly democratic process, the answer would be easy. There were 91% in favor; 9% against. But the idea that moving the service to 6pm might preclude households from ever coming gives us pause. Then again, there were those who said that the 7:15pm service was too late for their family and precluded them from coming.
We wrestled with these issues at the Religious Activities Committee. We reminded ourselves that no decision has to be forever. We don't want to be afraid to try something new. We are speaking specifically about six services {3 in July and 3 in August) that would be impacted by the change. Our September through June schedule of First Fridays at 6pm and all other Fridays at 7:15pm still stands.
So...yes! We are moving to ALL 6pm services this July/August. All services at TBT will begin in the front hall with a "Pre- Neg" and the first prayers of Kabbalat Shabbat. At 6:20pm, we will move together into the sanctuary to complete our service. First Fridays will end at 7pm and others by 7:15pm so you can plan a leisurely Shabbat dinner following services.
One more thing! Unsolicited by the poll, several of you also wrote "Don't forget Beach Shabbat!" Our July 7th service will be ON THE BEACH at East Wharf at 6pm, followed by an Oneg, hosted once again {with our great appreciation!) by Lisa & Eric Rich at their home which is around the corner from the beach. You can also note that our "Shabbat Under the Stars" Shindig will be on the TBT deck on Friday, August 25.
Here's to a wonderful summer of Shabbat Services,
L'Shalom!
Rabbi Offner
Rabbi's Column - June 2017
Editor’s Note: These remarks were first shared on the occasion of TBT’s 40th Annual Meeting.
On September 2, 1971, there was a short article in the Shoreline Times that changed the lives of each one of us. The article was headlined: "Jewish Congregation." The article read:
The Shoreline Jewish Community Congregation will meet at the Grove School dining
room on Friday, September 10th at 8pm. Those who have not been contacted may
call Mrs. Barbara Sklaire for further information.
Thus Temple Beth Tikvah was born. 46 years ago. Six years later, land was purchased and a building was constructed. This building. It wasn’t a given.
The founders - our founders - didn’t have a map with precise instructions. Should we build a building? Maybe we should just buy books. Bricks or books? Given the choice, I would choose books every time.
But maybe it is not simply a choice. Maybe we need the bricks to house the books. We need the building to house the people. We need a sanctuary that God might dwell amongst us.
I confess: looking back over this past year, there are moments when it doesn’t feel like God is present. Moments of strife. Moments of challenge. Moments of administrivia.
The holiest moments are so clear: when we filled this sanctuary to over-flowing for Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur. When we built our Sukkah out on our deck and packed the deck for services. When we had one of our largest Passover seders on record and filled this Social Hall with Pesach spirit and matza balls.
But God doesn’t need holidays to join us. Every time we have the opportunity to say hello to someone we haven’t met before, God is present. When we try new ideas, like our Jewish Mindfulness and Meditation practice, God is present. When we bring MahJongg into the library on Friday afternoons, God is present.
Our Religious School boasts over 100 children, our Sunday morning Tefillah is robust with singing and prayer. Our Nursery School children spell L-O-V-E with every smile. Our staff cares for each other and cares for you in ways beyond measure.
Bricks or Books? Building or People? A little 3-letter-word helps us answer the question. The word is A-N-D. Bricks AND Books. Building AND People.
We hope to care for our building by making it more welcoming, more inclusive, more accessible, and lighter, warmer, and more open.
Most important of all, remember that it only matters to the extent that we, the people, become more welcoming, more inclusive, more accessible, and lighter, warmer, and more open. I believe that we have grown in all of these attributes over the past year, and I hope we will continue the trend in the year ahead.
L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner