Rabbi's Column

Rabbi's Column February 2020

We have the extraordinary opportunity to have the director of the film “From Cairo to the Cloud” join us at TBT as our Scholar-in-Residence this year.

Michelle Paymar is an award winning filmmaker whose credits include documentaries that have appeared on NBC, ABC, CBS and PBS. Earlier films include her pioneering AIDS documentary, “For Our Lives,” and “Sippie,” a documentary (co-directed by Roberta Grossman) about blues artist Sippie Wallace.

“From Cairo to the Cloud” documents the discovery of the Cairo Geniza (a geniza is a receptacle for holy Jewish texts) and its subsequent safeguarding in ’The Cloud’ by a tenacious group of scholars. The Cairo Geniza revolutionized our understanding of Jewish history and illuminated a thousand years of vibrant Jewish life in the heart of the Islamic world.

There is so much to learn from the documents and from the filmmaker. We get to do both at our Scholar-in-Residence Weekend, March 20 -21, 2020.

To a great weekend of discovery!
- Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column January 2020

Dear Friends,

January is the coldest month of the year if not, thankfully, the snowiest. I look at the month ahead of us and, with that chill in the air, I look forward to warming up the weeks ahead with special projects and gatherings at TBT.

The first activity that I want to highlight is a very easy way for you to do a huge mitzvah. The State of Israel is preparing right now to host the World Zionist Congress, and your vote can make a real impact on shaping the Israel of the future to be pluralistic and egalitarian. Let me explain:

The World Zionist Congress has been meeting ever since Theodore Herzl established it in Basel, Switzerland in 1897. The Congress is comprised of worldwide Jewry and the United States has a large presence. If we can ALL vote for Reform Jewish delegates to be seated at the Congress, it could mean as much as $20 million dollars slated for projects in Israel that benefit a liberal expression of Judaism and allows for the flourishing of Reform Judaism in Israel. We can do this! Please make a commitment to vote – it will be made simple for you to do so by our fearless ARZA-WZC co-chairs, Mara Weissman and Andrea San Marco. They will be putting ballot information in your inboxes when the time comes to be able to vote. Just be on the lookout and promise to make a wonderful difference for Israel.

Other activities I look forward to in January include teaching a Lunch & Learn, this time on Tuesdays from 12:30 PM - 2 PM with a focus on the book of Genesis and how the actual Hebrew words of the text reveal its meaning.

I also want to mention the Gamerman Film Festival which usually warms us up in January but has moved this year to the month of March. Stay tuned.

The month of January coincides this year with the Hebrew month of Tevet. You may recognize in that Hebrew name the word “Tov” which means “good.” The rabbis consider Tevet to be a good month because, since it is so cold, it causes people to want to seek warmth by being close to one another.

By all means, let us warm each other up during this otherwise cold month of January.

L’Shalom,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column December 2019

Mondays are my day off. I love Mondays. And no, it’s not exactly because Monday’s are my day off but rather, it is because of what I choose to do with my day off. Every Monday since he has been born, Nancy and I ‘grandmasit’ for our grandson who is now 8 years old. It is the joy of our lives, but don’t take my word for it – just ask any grandparent who gets to take care of their grandchild(ren) and you will know how true it is.

It is a blessing for so many reasons. It is a blessing to be able to help your children, even when they themselves are adults. It is a blessing to be needed and to be able to deliver on that need. It is a blessing to be helpful. And of course, the obvious, it is a blessing to be able to develop a precious relationship with your grandchild.

It is so important for people who are on the older end of the lifecycle to be able to interact with young children. You don’t have to be a grandparent to do so. It sure is one of the precious gifts of being a part of Temple Beth Tikvah. It is home for people of every age and therefore we all have ‘grandchildren’ and ‘grandparents’ right here, even if we don’t have literal grand-family, or if our own grand-family is geographically far away.

It makes me want our children to be able to better interact with our elders, and it makes me want our elders to be better integrated into our programming for children.

We see it at services. Remember the High Holidays? (Not that long ago!) Surely one of the highlights is when the children come up onto the bima and sing “Oseh Shalom.” I don’t think there is a dry eye in the house! All of our elders are enchanted. Our kids are giving them a gift beyond their awareness.

That gift doesn’t have to happen just once a year.

It’s simple. Just consider these options. If you are an adult who is not busy raising your own children, just let me know if you would like to be a “grand-sitter.” Alternatively, if you are a person without any elders in your life, let me know if you would like to strike up a friendship with someone who might be a generation ahead of you.

I am a great matchmaker, and these kind of matches are the best of all.

L’Shalom,
Rabbi

Rabbi's Column November 2019

Dear Friends,

I addressed the issue of anti-Semitism in my sermon on Rosh Hashana morning. I noted that anti-Semitic incidents are on an historic rise in this country and all over the world. We can’t delude ourselves…. that means right here in our sweet Shoreline home as well. One sermon is not enough to counter and respond to this terrible phenomenon. That is why we are committed to addressing the issue of anti-Semitism and of all kinds of hatred directed against the ‘other.’ At the same time we must work together with other faith communities to foster the bonds of mutual respect.

Two important events are upcoming in November. We are most honored to have Tom Scarice, the Superintendent of the Madison Schools (pictured, right), coming to TBT to address important issues about how we teach our children in these difficult times.

I am also honored to participate in an important interfaith program with an Imam and a Priest that is coordinated by the Foote School and open to all.

Please join us for these events and commit to being a part of the solution when it comes to addressing anti-Semitism, racism, Islamophobia, and other hatreds.

L’Shalom,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column October 2019

OUR HIGH HOLY DAY SEASON CONTINUES…..

YOM KIPPUR: Return, Reflect, Recharge
Kol Nidrei: Tuesday, October 8, 8pm
Morning Service: Wednesday, October 9, 10am
Afternoon Service: Wednesday, October 9, 3:30pm
Break-the-Fast: Wednesday, October 9, ~6:45pm

SUKKOT: Celebrate our Autumnal Bounty Shake the Lulav
Enjoy the Open Sky
Wednesday, October 16 Sukkot Dinner on the Deck and in the Sukkah, 5:15pm
Sukkot Service: 6pm

SIMCHAT TORAH: Unfurl the Torah! Dance with the Torah! Our energetic capstone to the High Holy Days. Sunday, October 20 Simchat Torah Service: 6-7pm
Festive Make-Your-Own Caramel Apples Oneg: 7pm

Rabbi's Column September 2019

Dear Friends,

Curiously enough, the month of September coincides in its entirety with the Jewish month of Elul. September 1, 2019 is also Elul 1, 5779. It means that this entire month is dedicated to preparing for the High Holy Days. What does it mean to prepare? What does Rosh Hashanah mean to you? I find these holidays both exhilarating and utterly exhausting. The exhaustion, I find, is deeply connected to the demand to assess our lives. What is important? What really matters? How am I utilizing this one life that is mine alone?

I want to share some responses to these questions that come straight from the brilliant Rabbi Jonathan Sacks, who served as Chief Rabbi of Great Britain and now writes extensively on Jewish themes.

In the Rosh Hashana Machzor that he edited, he asks: “What does Rosh Hashana say to us? Of what is it a reminder? How can it transform our lives?” He gives responses worth of our reflection this month. They are, in brief:

1. Life is short. However much life expectancy has risen, we will never in one lifetime be able to achieve everything we might wish to achieve.
2. Life itself, each day, every breath we take, is the gift of God. Life is not something we may take for granted.
3. We are free. Judaism is the religion of the free human being freely responding to the God of freedom.
4. Life is meaningful. We are not mere accidents of matter, generated by a universe that came into being for no reason.
5. Life is not easy. Judaism does not see the world through rose-tinted lenses.
6. Life may be hard, but it can still be sweet.
7. Our life is the single greatest work of art we will ever make.

What does Rosh Hashana say to you?

L'shana tova,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column Summer 2019

Dear Friends,

Welcome to our “Summer” SHOFAR. Instead of a monthly newsletter, we have a July/August issue. It is time to roll out those lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer. July and August on the Shoreline are especially sweet with all sorts of opportunities to take advantage of in the summer weather and our splendid environment.

We at TBT do our own version of celebrating the summer months. Chief among them is our “Beach Shabbat.” If you have been before, you know how very special they are. We are thankful to our TBT members who live walking distance from the East Wharf Beach and have opened up their homes over the years for the sweetest of onegs following our beach services.

Please remember to bring a beach chair – and as these services have become increasingly popular, we ask that you carpool to the beach, leaving some room at the parking lot for others who also want to enjoy a Friday evening sunset.

Our July and August Shabbat services all begin at 6 PM. Other than July 19 and August 9 when we will be on the beach, our summer services will begin with a “Pre-Neg” at 6 PM followed by a short service so you can be out the door and on your way at 7-ish. If the weather is nice, we may very well have our service outside on the deck.

Add Beach Shabbat to your list of summer activities.

Hope yours is a great summer,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column June 2019

Note: these remarks were first shared at the TBT Annual Meeting on May 14, 2019.

As I reflect upon this past year at TBT, a phrase comes to mind: “it’s all about the people.” We have been doing a lot of talking about the building – and that is critically important – but it is critically important because it is a house of the people. I want to speak tonight a bit about the people. In particular, I want to speak about the people who live here in this building, virtually 24/7. And that means the staff. This year has been like no other in TBT’s history because we have walked through it with our new Cantor.

Cantor Stanton came to us shortly after last year’s Annual Meeting. It has been a year of transition for him and for us – a year of beautiful transition as he has become a part of our TBT family. When he interviewed for the position, we knew he had a spectacular voice. He still does. It has been enriching us, elevating our joyous moments and softening the blows of the difficult moments. What we have come to learn is that Cantor Stanton has a fabulous sense of humor, a generous, generous spirit, a big caring heart, a love of our children and a love for people of all ages. In just one year, Cantor Stanton has become family. Our thanks to him for his dedication and commitment to us.

I do believe that this June marks an anniversary. A blessed anniversary at that. We are celebrating the 5th anniversary of Kim Romine’s tenure as our Temple Administrator. Kim has a heart of gold. She also has an obsession for organization and numbers. It is an extraordinary combination. She is able to combine billing and statements and dues and payments with heart and love and soul. How fortunate we are. And Kim’s talents go beyond that as you can see her climbing to clean the gutters, noticing every nook and cranny of our fragile building, keeping her office window open so she can delight in the sounds of our Nursery School children playing in the playground – Kim is everywhere, caring for every member of this holy congregation. Thank you, Kim, for everything you do.

Bonnie Mahon is a professional in customer service and she is the first line of welcome, both at the door and on the phone. Bonnie is always happy to see you, to help you, to respond to any and every request that is made of her. As a special bonus: she loves our Hebrew School children. She knows them all by name – and she knows you by name, too. How lucky we are.

Our staff team also includes our Custodial team of Len & Dyanna and now Steven, too. Len sets up our social hall for onegs, for dinners, for special programs. He cleans the sanctuary and even polishes the Torah silver. He does it all with pleasure. Dyanna is with us every Shabbat, making oneg hosting an easy mitzvah for our members. And Steven is new to our Nursery School and their custodial needs.

Speaking of the Nursery School, we are in the midst of an enormous transition. Bernadette Stak, our Nursery School Director for the past 24 years, is leaving at the end of this school year. Bernadette is the engine behind the TBT Nursery School having such an extraordinary reputation in the community, and her children are your children, many of whom have gone on from the Nursery School to graduate from High School and college, and get married and have children. I can’t tell you how many people around town tell me that they or their children are graduates of our Nursery School.

But time marches on and changes do happen. Thanks to the guiding force of Peter Chorney and Deb Coe at the helm of our Education Committee, we have hired a brilliant successor to Bernadette. Jen Casillo is already doing her magic with the Nursery School, and I hope that everyone here at TBT can begin to know her as we have begun to know her.

TBT is all about the people. The staff….and the congregants who create holy community whenever you enter our doors. Together, we have done extraordinary things this past year, and we can look forward to a promising year ahead.

L'Shalom,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column May 2019

Yom HaShoah this year will be like no other for 29 members of the TBT community. As you receive this SHOFAR, we will be in Eastern Europe, traveling from Vienna to Prague and then to Krakow and Warsaw. We will dare, with great trepidation, to visit Auschwitz, a place that cries in our souls, a land relegated to yesterday, but a place that is all too real and stands today as a memorial to the millions of Jews who were gassed and slaughtered there.

I invite you all to journey with us, if not physically, then in spirit. Assuming that this SHOFAR arrives at your door on the first of May, then you can imagine that we will already have experienced Jewish Vienna, both the Judenplatz Holocaust Memorial, the New Jewish Museum and the Stadttempel, built in 1826, and the only synagogue to have survived Kristallnact in 1938. Perhaps most important of all, we will have visited the Jewish community of 2019 and its rabbi, Rabbi Bar Ami, who will share with us the accounts of the thriving Jewish life of the local progressive Jewish community of Vienna.

On May 1st, we travel to Prague where we will spend time in the Old City to visit Prague’s beautiful Alt-New Synagogue, the Pinchas Synagogue, the Maisel Synagogue and the Spanish Synagogue. We will be on the lookout for the Golem, our dear friend who was invented in Prague to protect the Jewish people. We will be in Prague for Yom HaShoah and will note the occasion with a memorial service at the famed Jewish cemetery in the heart of the city.

We will travel from Prague to Poland, arriving in Krakow just in time to celebrate Shabbat. Our Friday night services on May 3rd will be at the Krakow JCC, a bustling and energetic center of Jewish life today. We are grateful to the community for hosting us for Shabbat services and for Shabbat dinner where we will get to sit and mingle with our Jewish counterparts in Krakow.

We pray that our visit with the Krakow JCC sustains us as we then dedicate an entire day to paying homage to the 6 million at Auschwitz-Birkenau.

We spend our last 2 days (May 5 and 6) in Warsaw. We will visit the Jewish Historical Society, the highly-rated POLIN Museum (the New Museum of the History of Polish Jews), and the Warsaw Ghetto.

These visits are sobering – but traveling with treasured synagogue family gives us strength and inspiration. So too does the cultural backdrop of Europe’s beauty – we will begin in Vienna with a Mozart and Strauss musical concert and we will end in Warsaw, the city of Frederic Chopin’s birth, with a magnificent concert of Chopin’s music.

Our tired but fulfilled travelers will be back home midweek, just in time to refresh ourselves and ready ourselves for Shabbat Services back at TBT on May 10.

L’Shalom,
Rabbi Offner

Rabbi's Column

It’s time to prepare for Pesach. Seems that there is more preparation for Pesach than for most holidays. In fact, much of the actual holiday is about the ways that we prepare.

So much to consider! There is cleaning and cooking and selecting a hagadah and considering the meaning of words we say each and every year, that take on new meaning each and every year.

Consider the words: “Let all who are hungry come and eat.” How do we honor this tradition? At TBT, we have a 2nd night seder that everyone is welcome to join. And though it is a catered event, with costs involved, we are emphatic that no one be turned away and so the Sharon Besser 2nd Night Seder Fund assures that “All who are hungry can come and eat.”

And yet – being provided one dinner isn’t enough for those on a subsistence budget. And so there is the annual TBT Food Drive that takes place from the 1st of April right up until the 1st Seder. Won’t you take part in it? Just pay attention when the Social Justice Committee asks for your contributions by going online and ordering fresh food to be delivered to the Branford Community Dining Room.

Cleaning for Pesach is like no other cleaning. Getting rid of all chametz requires emptying closets and refrigerators and assuring that not even one bread crumb escapes our brooms and sponges. It is the original “Spring Cleaning.” But those who think it is strictly a physical cleaning are mistaken. We rid ourselves of ‘chametz,’ which are any grains that contain leaven and are therefore ‘puffed up.’ So too, it is while on our hands and knees cleaning the floor, that it is the best time to consider the ways we ‘puff ourselves up,’ with pride and an inflated sense of self and lack of awareness about our weaknesses.

One of the most important lines in the Haggadah is “In every generation we are called upon to see ourselves as though we ourselves escaped from Egypt.” It is a line that shouts out to us today: remember where you came from! Remember that you came from slaves! Remember that you are a child of immigrants! And more: Remember that you yourself are an immigrant. Maybe, just maybe, if we can see ourselves as immigrants we will start treating others with more respect and dignity and welcome.

And one more final line in every Haggadah: “Next year in Jerusalem.” These words were never taken literally. Though it would surely be lovely to make a commitment to spend time in Jerusalem in the coming year, the phrase always reminded us of our hope in something greater than today, greater than the here and now. The Hebrew words “Yerushalayim” translate as “City of Peace.” Would that we could create that city of peace all over the world. What a soaring conclusion to Passover that would be.

My best to you for a zissen Pesach – a joyous and sweet Passover.

L’Shalom,
Rabbi Offner